I often write about "value-led actions or goals". In this article, you can find out what this actually means and how it benefits you to know your values and actively incorporate them into your life.
What are values?
Values describe the qualities you want to colour your actions with. Values are what is important to you deep in your heart. They put into words what you want to stand for and have stood for in your life, what should characterise you. These can be things like freedom, reliability, friendliness, courage, a thirst for adventure or creativity, to name just a few examples.
What characteristics values have
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They can and may differ depending on the area of your life. If you assume that the core values of one area of your life must be reflected in all other areas, this can lead to restrictions. For example, values such as care, compassion and a loving attitude can be important in the family sphere. It can be a hindrance if this leads to the expectation that these values should also be applied to the same extent in other areas of life, even though you may have a different focus there. For example, different things may be important to you in a work-related context.
There is a nice metaphor on the subject of values - they are similar to a globe. No matter how fast you turn it, you will never be able to see all the continents at once, some will be on the front, others on the back. It's the same with values. Some are in the foreground at times, others in the background; you have to prioritise. You will always have to consciously decide which ones to bring to the forefront and which ones need to take a back seat.
Living guided by your values pays off
The beauty of value-led life and actions: It conveys a sense of meaning, significance or vibrancy and vitality. So value-led action is rewarding in itself. Even if you don't achieve a goal, there is something rewarding about living the underlying values. It's not just about grand gestures, but also about the very small actions you take to live your values every day. You also never have to justify your values. You may have to justify your actions and goals. If a "thirst for adventure" is important to you, you don't have to explain yourself. But if you are planning a trip around the world, you will probably have to explain yourself to other people (and explaining why you want to do this and what meaning, what value is behind it for you can make this much easier).
Values provide orientation
Your values can be used as decision-making guide and represent the common thread in (everyday) life. They help to define goals for your own life and stages of life. This allows you to formulate the steps that are necessary to get there and ultimately fulfil your needs and desires. Values stand like an umbrella over concrete goals. Achieving goals is usually not within your full control. So if you don't achieve a goal, you have still lived your values on the way there. You are not left empty-handed, but can plan your next actions based on your values. The same applies to goals you have already achieved. Here you will find an entertaining video that beautifully illuminates why a value-led existence is to be appreciated more than a goal-led one.
Clients are usually not doing well in one or more areas of their lives. As a rule, this suffering is linked to an important value that cannot currently be lived. And if you then delve a little deeper into the topic, after a while ways usually come to light as to how an important value can be lived despite the presence of limiting factors.
For example, someone who actually values connection and closeness may behave distantly or withdraw very quickly out of fear that another person might reject them. They may find it difficult to bear the painful thoughts and feelings of not being enough for the other person. They would rather not allow too much closeness than accept the option of actually experiencing rejection. At that moment, a separation from one's own values takes place. And this is where we can then look at how the connection can be re-established, how this value can be lived despite hindering factors.
What are your values?
Are you aware of them? It is possible to select a few values from a list of many that seem important to you. Perhaps there is a value that appeals to you that you have not lived up to now. You have the choice, you can start to live this value more from now on. Perhaps you can also think of a situation in which you felt very alive and you can look at which value you lived in this situation. You might also ask yourself whether a few of your values really reflect how you want to be. It can help to think back to important major decisions from the recent past - what values did you act on there? Did that feel good?
Find out more about your own values and how you can live them better: Let me send you an exercise on this here.